Wednesday, 11 March 2015

Embracing Changes #StartANewLife

I never was afraid to start over. This is about the time when I was busy day and night praying to be blessed with resurrection. I was done with my class tenth boards and was all ready to choose the stream I wished to do for the next two years even after knowing that I am not going to be allowed to choose on my own. 

I was out in the veils of the morning on a nearby railway station thinking nothing as I was asked to leave home if I still was thinking of doing anything else other than the prestigious IIT exam and that is exactly I was not absolutely thinking of. I had to haul myself up to there where I saw men littered all over the footpath, asleep , I saw beggars shivering in cold and what not. It was all diabolic as there were men staring and laying drugged in tiredness. Thinking, homelessness is a strange world, I just decided to get back to the home even after realizing that it was a bit infra dig! I decided to put an end to my passion for writing and better be housebroken. I have had sleepless nights and countless days. Two years were more like two decades at that time. I was studying nothing never minding for the grades I was going to get with this attitude towards studies. Moreover, I got engaged in every wrong deed and in turn I did extremely bad in class twelfth boards. Then came a time when I just wanted to end my life just as I ended everything else like my dreams and all. As I did nothing as expected, my parents were scolding me all the time and I was living anyhow slovenly. I used to write poems before all these petty decisions were taken for my career. I culminated this passion for writing from there only which I thought had vanished by the time my mind had virtually stopped responding to life. Being a nocturnal, I prefer night to witness my creations and so once, I just tried writing something out of nothing to see if I had really changed forgetting the only thing I was good at. I got my favorite poem then only and that filled me with a kind of boldness that evoked me to dignify myself with some hope and renewal. I confronted my parents with more confidence this time to tell them that I had already filled the form of my desired University and the course too which happened to be Philosophy. From Science to Philosophy, it came as a bigger shock to them and I really had to be rebellious and fight more this time. 

I used to leave home with all my documents to seek admission travelling 12 to 13 hours a day as I was not given admission in the former cut offs reason being my bad results. I was facing worst of both the sides,the world all geared to make everything devil-like for me and home of course, making everything difficult for me with so many demoralizing taunts. I was determined this time and I take pride in admitting that I got admission in one of the best colleges for Philosophy in the LAST cut off. My parents finally agreed to this because they had seen me strained apart from everything I was forced into. I am happy and trying to improve my writing skills and using my studies to make it better. It is indeed a better life. For me it did not take a moment to change my life rather it was more of a journey, the best journey for sure. In addition, this journey makes me realize more and more that I really never was afraid to start over! 

#StartANewLife with Housing!!! 

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